I wanted to add some further thoughts about getting physical. I just remembered an anecdote that might be informative.

It might seem counterintuitive but sometimes when a girl is not physically affectionate with you, it can be an indication that there’s attraction. There was one girl who I’ve known for a few years now. She’s in my circle of friends and all the guys are attracted to her.

I initially didn’t pursue her romantically because for some reason or another there has always been some logistical problem that prevented us from getting together, either I wasn’t single or she wasn’t single, etc. One thing that was conspicuous is that whenever it came time to say goodbye, she would hug all the other guys but I never got a hug. She was really flirty with the other guys but physically distant from me. She was warm and friendly, but just never touched me.

I think back to my unconfident days and I would have interpreted that physical distance as non-attraction, but this time I knew better. I knew that there was something there. I could feel it. This is another example of trusting your gut rather than letting insecurities run you. And sure enough, there came a time when we were both single, and we were alone and out of the blue I just kissed her.

Now we didn’t end up in a relationship for various reasons that I won’t get into, but we’re still great friends and still get together (yes, in “that” way) occassionally. She admitted to me that she stayed physically distant from me on purpose (by the way, she hasn’t hooked up with anyone else in our circle of friends, just me).

Women are so interesting.